La coupe du Monde: Wrestling Wrap Up: The Case for New Champ Jinder Mahal

Plus, Breezango almost captures tag gold, Goldust returns to his roots, SmackDown sets the stage for Money in the Bank, and more.

By Matt Fowler

For the most part, I'm not against Jinder Mahal becoming WWE Champ. For the most part. Mostly. Mowestlee. [insert picture of Newt from Aliens, which I could actually easily do instead of typing this insert sentence]

Oh, but everyone's got such strong opinions on the matter. So many opinions. Look at all the hot takes! Everyone, come see how hot I take. So let's dig into the nitty and the gritty here and try to see every side of the equation. You know, so we can gain some perspective. But not too much perspective.

Backlash almost gave its big main event finish away -- and you can read all my mind thoughts about the PPV here -- in the sense that nothing big was happening at all on the undercard. Not only were there no title changes, but nothing of note, nothing that popped, was occurring either. Nothing particularly memorable. And while Jinder Mahal stood a small chance of shocking the world with an upset win against Orton heading into the show, the fact that it was either him winning or the entire show would be instantly forgettable made his victory almost certain.

Now, here's what's good about Jinder's win(der). It's a change up. Something new. And, trust me, nothing says NOTHING new like Randy Orton as WWE Champ. So the wind blew the complete opposite direction here. Randy didn't lose his belt back to a former champ, he lost it to a fast-tracked upstart who everyone thought was just a minor hurdle. But within Jinder's new packaging laid all the telltale signs of a textbook heel champ. The "rich" background. Suits. Limos. The royalty aspect. The goon squad. And, as the icky icing, the xenophobia card. His new gimmick was primed and ready for championship gold.

Jinder's big moment also spoke, once again, to the fact that SmackDown Live is the place where you can, basically, hit one of those Mario Kart boost pads and rocket toward main event success. That doesn't happen on RAW. In fact, RAW's champ is basically off in a cave and holding that Universal title like Smeagol and the One Ring. It speaks well to the Blue Brand and the Blue Brand's gimmick.

And you should always be able to push a dude to the top of you're in need of a new face in the main event scene. I'll always remember how Yokozuna came out of nowhere, won the Rumble, and then beat Bret at WrestleMania. I thought it was strange and new, but I wasn't against it. You could even say Ric Flair's WWF Championship win was pretty fast, but he came in with a golden legacy. Sure, perhaps not every WWF fan at the time knew all his exploits and accomplishments, but the fact that some of us did allowed him to start at above-the-mid-card levels.

The problem that some have with Jinder though is that he did spend so long in the WWE at the bottom of the card. And, as of somewhat recently, he was part of a stable whose entire gimmick was "creative has nothing for us so here we are as a ragtag team of mismatched jobbers." So Jinder automatically comes with baggage. He hasn't come outta nowhere, like so many RKOs. Just a few months back he was losing regularly in five minute matches. Granted, the fact that Jinder went from zilch to Xanadu is built into the story itself, but the fact that he still has that unremarkable WWE past will always hover in the background like a Dementor.

Now, let's get into what doesn't quite work about Jinder. I already brought up the undercard baggage. But let's talk in-ring performance. He's good. He's a solid hand, as the kids say down in Hand Land. But he's not great. Not that you have to be if the rest of your persona falls into place, but Jinder's not blowing anyone away from bell-to-bell.

Also, and this is weird to bring up, Jinder's push came after he came back sporting a new jakkkkkkkedd body. Like, there's fit and then there's the type of fit that makes you feel uncomfortable because you're seeing veins you're not supposed to and back acne you don't want to. With Jinder's return came assorted rumors that he's on steroids and that he's now being rewarded for being in freakish shape because Vince loves that 'roided-out look. I'M JUST SAYING, that he's a beast but also one that shouldn't be shaking hands with HD TVs.

Also, Jinder's ascension makes you feel a bit sad for BRAAAAUUUUN since this is the type of sky-rocketing that should have happened to him months ago. But they waited too long and then when it started to come together for him, he got hurt. If Braun were on SmackDown, he'd be WWE Champ, US Champ, GM, and Commissioner.

Okay, so the big change happened at Backlash. Jinder "shocked the world." But how psyched are we now days later? Firstly, he's still feuding with Orton, and that's a chore and a half for anyone. Secondly, how many of you are buying JBL's overwhelming excitement about Jinder's triumph? I get that he's there to honk the horn for the heels, but I just don't believe it when he tries to scream like a schoolgirl about "THE MAHARAJA!" Why does JBL care that "ALL OF INDIA" is now watching this man? It's one thing to be pro-bad guy, but it's another to all of a sudden care so much about the overseas demo.

Anyhow, change is good, chest zits are not. I think that's my whole spiel in a nutshell. I'm at the top of my game here.